4. The Wabbit and the GM Carrot Crisis

The Wabbit and Lovely Lapinette followed the Genetically Modified Skarrots to the supermarket, hid behind the peppers and waited. Then they heard a series of whoosh-whoosh sounds and saw orange rays dart into every corner of the vegetable section. "Everything's turning carrot-coloured," said Lapinette. "Keep out of the way of these rays," said the Wabbit, or we'll be orange too." "Yuk!" said Lapinette and flattened herself against the pepper stand. "If we don't stop them, every living thing will become a Skarrot," grunted the Wabbit and he rummaged in his fur for anything he could find - because just for the moment he had no idea how to stop the creatures. Lapinette grimaced as a carrot ray sliced past her ear. "They seem very annoyed," said Lapinette. "That's the transgenic bacteria," said the Wabbit. "It makes them mad and spreads like wildfire. And it seems to be colour-based." "You know more than I thought," said Lapinette. "I know too much for my own good," said the Wabbit and he thought for a minute. "What colour turns orange into green?" he asked. "Blue," said Lapinette with a smile. "Big Blue Snail!" said the Wabbit. "I'll get him and my Snazer slime gun. I won't be a minute." "What am I  supposed to do in the mean time?" said Lapinette. "Keep out of their way and pick up some artichoke tubers for dinner," suggested the Wabbit. "You want me to shop?" asked Lapinette. "Blend in," said the Wabbit. "You'll hear more of this," scowled Lapinette. "I know," said the Wabbit. Then he vanished.

3. The Wabbit and the GM Skarrots

The Wabbit and Lovely Lapinette took a short cut, but somehow the Skarrots managed to evade them. "Look they're over there!" hissed Lapinette and they both took up positions behind a pole and watched as the Skarrots queued for a bus to the city. "Surprising behaviour," said the Wabbit. "They've been coached!" said Lapinette. "Why don't you call it in to the Department, see what they know." The Wabbit got on the blower as he called it, and started muttering things in code. His radio hissed and the Wabbit hit it hard with his paw. "Shhh!" he said. It crackled slightly. "That's better," said the Wabbit and he spoke softly. "Yes, they're getting on the bus now. Yes, yes. Oh yes. No." "What's going on?" whispered Lapinette. "Apparently the plan is to let them go where they're going. Nothing must impede them." "Where are they going?" asked Lapinette. "We''re going to find out," said the Wabbit and shut off his radio. "The driver won't have change for 50 Euro notes," said Lapinette. "Don't worry," said the Wabbit. "I know him and I told him to expect unusuality." "And you'll owe him a dinner I suppose," said Lapinette. "Money well spent," said the Wabbit. "Unusuality isn't a word," said Lapinette. "Yes it is," said the Wabbit. "I bet you dinner it's not," said Lapinette. "OK," said the Wabbit and he smiled a confident smile. "It is a word isn't it?" sighed Lapinette. "Big eats!" grinned the Wabbit.

2. The Wabbit & the Horrifying Arrivals

Acting on information received, the Wabbit and Lovely Lapinette slipped into the airport unobserved and, hiding behind a distant carousel, they watched in horror as Genetically Modified carrots poured from the luggage belt. "This carousel is never used," whispered Lapinette. "That’s because it never works," said the Wabbit. "Well it’s working today," said Lapinette. "Do you think the Skarrots will go through customs?" "I don’t think they’re big on passports," said the Wabbit. "Maybe they’ll eat their way through," said Lapinette. The Wabbit started to smile, but then he grimaced. "The things will spread out across the city, foraging," he said. "I suppose they’re not big on restaurants either," said Lapinette. "They’ll start with the customers," said the Wabbit, "and then eat furnishings, crockery and they particularly like to destroy High School Musical posters." "That’s in their favour, I suppose," said Lapinette sniffily. The Wabbit allowed himself a chortle, but one of the Skarrots turned and they both ducked for cover. "What can stop them?" hissed  Lapinette. "I don’t know yet," said the Wabbit. "Exploding them with C4 only causes them to divide and multiply." "Every enemy has a weak point," murmured Lapinette, thinking of a book she’d been reading." "Did you find that in the Carrot Library?" asked the Wabbit. "No, in the "Day of the Triffids","  said Lapinette. “How do they do it?” asked the Wabbit. "Crop ‘em, chop ‘em and cook ‘em," said Lapinette sweetly.

1. The Wabbit and the Carrot Library

Lapinette clutched her book as if her life depended on it, because she had found some surprising information on Genetically Modified vegetables. The Wabbit emerged from the library and hailed her. "Do come in Lapinette, everything’s laid out for your research," he cried with some glee. "I never knew the Carrot Library existed," said Lapinette. "Oh it’s very new," said the Wabbit. "It’s an independent venture of the Carrot Club." "Of which you are this year’s Grand Daucus,” said Lapinette kindly. The Wabbit bowed gravely. "Who pays for it?" asked Lapinette. "The Carrot Club does, through public subscriptions, private grants and fund raising events," said the Wabbit proudly. "No Department of Wabbit Affairs money then?" said Lapinette slyly. "Not as such," said the Wabbit. Lapinette looked at the Wabbit and inclined her head.  "The Agitprop section has a special books, stationery and apparatus allowance, part of which I cause to arrive here," admitted the Wabbit. Lapinette was used to the Wabbit’s unorthodox, yet somehow fair budget adjustments. "Did you find the Skarrot locator device?" she ventured.  "I did," said the Wabbit. "It can identify any rogue carrot within a distance of 400 kilometres." "What constitutes a rogue carrot exactly?" said Lapinette. "Arms, legs, eyes, bared teeth and a voracious appetite," said the Wabbit. "What do they eat?" said Lapinette. "Everything that gets in their way," said the Wabbit. 

The Wabbit Accessorises

The Wabbit was waiting for Lapinette when she came hopping down the shop stairs. "Look what I found!" she cried. "Excellent!" said the Wabbit, automatically. "What have you been doing?" The Wabbit knew quite well what Lapinette had been doing, but he thought he'd better ask anyway. "I've been accessorising!" said Lapinette unexpectedly. The Wabbit could think of only two kinds of accessory. The first, you bolted onto other things and the second, you plugged in to something else. The Wabbit knew that in both cases, it gave the object concerned some extra functions. "Splendid," said the Wabbit. "That shirt looks a bit Tyrolean. Are you using it to strategise on the next mission?" "There's a new mission and I didn't hear?" said Lapinette with surprise.  "Well I think it's going to happen," said the Wabbit. "I was reading Carrot World and there are disturbing developments." Lapinette suddenly remembered that this was the Wabbit's year to perform the duties of Grand Daucus for the Carrot Club, so she didn't make any jokes. "Should I visit the armoury?" she asked hesitantly. "That would be wise," said the Wabbit. " Our far-flung outposts have suffered sabotage and wilful damage. Witnesses observed strange colourful creatures that looked like carrots." "Parrots?" said Lapinette. to make sure she'd heard properly. "Reports have to be verified," said the Wabbit, "but they're calling them Skarrots and you wouldn't want to run into them by accident!" Lapinette looked at the Wabbit with a questioning look. "They Meet and Eat," he said.

The Wabbits & the Intermission Band

"Perhaps the band might help us with our Autism appeal?" suggested Lapinette. The Wabbit merely turned and shouted, "Baião rhythm, 2/4 time!" The band complained good-naturedly about the change in tempo but nevertheless set up a driving beat and a "Too! ta-too, Too! ta-too," echoed round the buildings. The Wabbit looked at Lapinette and sang. “You, to me. Are sweet as roses in the morning." Lapinette looked back and sang in answer. "And you to me, are soft as summer rain at dawn. In love, we share that something rare." She stopped for an impossible instant and came in loud and late on the next line. "The sidewalks in the street!" Then they put their heads together, and  both sang. "The concrete and the clay beneath our feet, begins to crumble. But love will never die. Because we'll see the mountains tumble. Before we say goodbye." Now it was the Wabbit’s turn. "My love. And I. Will be in love eternally. That's the way. Mmm, that`s the way it's meant to be." Then the band joined in. "The sidewalks in the street! The concrete and the clay beneath our feet begins to crumble. But love will never die. Because we'll see the mountains tumble. Before we say goodbye." "Mmmm," sang the Wabbit. "That’s the way it’s meant to be," sang Lapinette. There was a smattering of applause from passers by. "Now you hop round and collect money for Autism," said the Wabbit. "Why me?" asked Lapinette. "You’ll get more than me," said the Wabbit. "I will?" queried Lapinette. "Trust me," said the Wabbit.


The featured autism organisation for this adventure is http://www.autism-society.org/get-involved/state-resources/wyoming.html

The Wabbits stop for Refreshments

Instead of materialising at home, the gang found themselves sitting in a hotel garden. The Wabbit looked at the Moto Snails with a gleam in his eye. "While you were carousing around, bringing down governments, we were looking for a suitable hostelry," said Mo. "We got a special price," said To. "We beat 'em down," said Mo. "Then aperitivi all round," smiled Lapinette. "I'll drink to that!" said Pio the Puppet. "You don't have to have a carrot aperitivo, Pio," said Lapinette, "what would you like?" "I'll have ..." said Pio, thinking furiously, "a Tomfooleries' 007" "What's that?" asked Lapinette. "I know," said the Wabbit. Everyone turned to look at him curiously. "Rum, orange juice and a splash of Sprite," he smiled. Everyone stared at the Wabbit, waiting for more information. "Named for a song by Desmond Dekker," said the Wabbit. No one flinched or said a word. "The rudeboys go wail, cause them out of jail," explained the Wabbit. "Them a loot, them a shoot, them a wail," he continued. This met with absolute silence. "Them on probation now," said the Wabbit finally. Everyone sighed a long sigh. "Serve 'em right," said Lapinette. Mo giggled. The Wabbit wished he'd kept his mouth shut and tried to hide his embarrassment with a question. "Pio, what kind of adventure would you say that was?" he asked, as he usually did. "Espionage thriller," said Pio. "Wabbit Spooks," said To. "I'd like to bring down a government," said Mo. "How would you replace it?" said To cautiously. "No government," shrugged Mo. Pio laughed and cracked his knuckles. "There's no government like No Government!" he grinned. And they all laughed and laughed and laughed.